What does the Bible say about flattery?

• Ezekiel 33:31, the deceit of flattery 
• Romans 16:18, flattery is self-serving
• 1 Thessalonians 2:3–7, no flattery from Paul 
• James 2:1–4, don't flatter or show partiality

Sermon ideas about flattery 

Flattery as vice 

What can a sermon say about the dangers of flattery? Although the Bible rarely uses the word flattery, it is deeply concerned with the core of flattery. The Bible commands God's people to be truthful even as it commands them to be especially mindful of the poor, the weak, and the marginalized. Flattery is a vice that leads us to tell lies (such as "You are the most wonderful person I've ever met," or "Your viewpoints are so much sharper than anyone else in our community!").  

Flattery is also sinful because it means we show deference for the wealthy and the powerful, treating them in ways we'd never treat the weak or the poor. Taken to an extreme, flattery ignores the very people God desires us to expend extra effort on—the poor—because the flatterers are too busy cozying up to those they believe will reward their attention with gifts of money, goods, or positions of privilege. Flattery is at once deceitful, discriminatory, and insincere. It's fake. Flattery also aids and abets the deadly sin of pride, puffing up those who may already be sufficiently puffed up in their own minds. 

Flattery vs. gospel witness 

The apostle Paul was particularly sensitive to the accusation that he was a glad-handing, smooth-talking flatterer. When criticized as such, Paul took pains to make plain that his motives were sincere. He wasn't trying to get anything from people; he was only trying to give the greatest treasure: the good news that we are all saved by grace through the love of Christ.  

Unfortunately, in Paul's day as now, some people—including, sad to say, some preachers—have ulterior motives, so it is necessary to distinguish genuine gospel proclamation from the messages of those who are trying to get something for themselves. 

Favoritism in James 

A sermon on flattery can also point out that the Bible tells us God shows no partiality (see Acts 10, in which Peter comes to realize that God's Spirit was at work even among non-kosher Gentiles). God's salvation and love show no favoritism; therefore, God's people must not either.  

No one is clearer on this than the apostle James. In James 2 we learn why the sin of flattery-inspired favoritism or partiality is so loathsome to God. The word used here for such favoritism is a rare word in the Bible: prosopolempteo. Literally, it means "to take hold of the face." It refers to the practice in the ancient world of a commoner bowing low to the ground when in the presence of a rich and powerful king. If the commoner found favor in the king's eyes, the king would extend his hand and raise the person's face so their gaze could meet his own. That was the sign of approval. 

James claims that the people in the congregations to whom he was writing were doing this toward the rich and powerful in the hope of currying favor and reaping monetary rewards. Not only does James find this behavior ridiculous—it was the rich, after all, who were more likely to file lawsuits or make life difficult in other ways—but it is also an end-run on Christ and on the gospel. We are not to bow our faces to the rich; rather, we give humble service to the poor, the marginalized, and everyone else in the church or in society, regardless of social rank.  

Waiting for only the rich and powerful to take hold of your face to give you approval makes you forget that God has already done this for all of us poor sinners. Our joyful privilege is to serve others—all others, not just the wealthy—in grace, even as we have been served. 

A loathsome trait 

Though almost everyone is tempted to engage in flattering speech or behavior when faced with rich or powerful people, most people despise flattery. It is typically described as "buttering up" or "sucking up" or "kissing up." Flatterers are described as bootlickers and, more coarsely, as brown-nosers. A flatterer may be called a yes-man, a sycophant, or in the earliest days of a flatterer's career, a teacher's pet. Other descriptions include toady, leech, and parasite. 

A society of flattery 

Finally, a sermon on flattery can highlight the role of flattery in today's culture. A celebrity-driven culture that glamorizes media stars and the wealthy runs a higher risk of both encouraging and rewarding flattery. TV talk shows routinely lavish praise on movie stars whose personal history and morality are scandalous. The rich are treated with kid gloves and sought out for their opinions on a range of subjects, despite their knowing less about those subjects than more learned individuals who never appear on television.  

Even the phenomenon of the selfie reflects people's desire—including the desire of many Christian people—to post pictures on social media of themselves standing next to a famous person, though it would never occur to them to take a selfie standing next to a homeless person or someone in need.